OpenAI drops $10B on NOT-Nvidia chips

Hey Snackers,

Happy Thursday!

OpenAI just signed a $10 BILLION deal for compute that doesn't rhyme with "Schmividia."

Meanwhile, Trump's team reversed Biden's chip ban faster than you can say "national security concerns."

And Matthew McConaughey literally trademarked himself to fight deepfakes.

The simulation is getting weird again...

Let's get into it!!

💸 OpenAI Drops $10B on Cerebras Because Nvidia Is So Last Year

• OpenAI just signed a $10 BILLION DEAL with Cerebras for 750 megawatts of compute over 3 years. That's enough power to run a small country (or make ChatGPT responses actually fast).

• The AI arms race isn't about who has the smartest model anymore - it's about who can deliver instant gratification at planetary scale. Also, Nvidia's monopoly just got its first real challenger (??) (source)

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🚫 Trump Admin: "Actually, China Can Have AI Chips Now"

• The new administration just approved Nvidia H200 chip sales to China, reversing Biden-era restrictions. Even Trump's former advisor is like "uhhhh guys??"

• We spent years building a tech wall with China, and now we're... selling them the bricks?? The geopolitical 4D chess is getting confusing. (source)

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🧠 Sam Altman's Brain-Computer Startup Gets $250M (From... OpenAI)

• OpenAI led funding for Merge Labs, Altman's new BCI company valued at $850 MILLION. Unlike Neuralink's brain surgery vibe, this one uses ~gentle ultrasound waves~

• Silicon Valley's endgame is literally merging with the machines. We're speedrunning to telepathic ChatGPT and honestly?? I'm scared. (source)

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🔢 ChatGPT Just Solved Math Problems That Stumped Humans for DECADES

• The latest model cracked 11 out of 15 Erdős problems - mathematical puzzles that have been unsolved since forever. Terence Tao is shook.

• AI isn't just regurgitating Wikipedia anymore - it's actually discovering new knowledge. Math professors in shambles rn. (source)

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📉 Oracle Gets Sued for $18B Because AI Infrastructure Is EXPENSIVE

• Bondholders are BIG MAD that Oracle "forgot" to mention it needed $38 billion more for AI data centers after selling them bonds. Oopsie!!

• The true cost of AI is so astronomical that even Wall Street didn't see it coming. Those GPU bills hit different. (source)

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💰 Microsoft Secretly Spending $500M/Year on Anthropic (While Dating OpenAI)

• Microsoft's dropping half a billion annually on Claude while still being OpenAI's sugar daddy. The polyamory era of AI partnerships!!

• Tech giants are hedging their bets harder than a crypto bro in 2021. Nobody knows who's gonna win, so they're funding everyone. (source)

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📚 Wikipedia Finally Charging AI Companies Rent

• Wikipedia signed deals with Microsoft, Meta, and Amazon to get PAID for all that training data. About time tbh.

• Even "free" knowledge has a price now. Wikipedia said "pay up or build your own encyclopedia" and honestly?? Good for them. (source)

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🇬🇧 UK Becomes Investment Magnet Thanks to AI Hype

• Britain pulled $85 billion annually in foreign investment (up 40%!!) mostly from AI and clean energy mega-deals.

• Countries embracing AI are becoming money magnets. The UK went from Brexit chaos to AI paradise real quick. (source)

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🎬 McConaughey Trademarks "Alright, Alright, Alright" to Fight Deepfakes

• Matthew McConaughey secured 8 trademarks including his iconic catchphrase. His lawyers are ready to sue any AI that tries to be him.

• Celebrities are getting CREATIVE with anti-deepfake weapons. Can't wait for the first "trademark infringement by AI voice clone" lawsuit. (source)

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🎵 Bandcamp Bans AI Music (Based)

• Bandcamp just said NO to all AI-generated music. They want fans to know humans actually made the songs.

• FINALLY a platform taking a stand. While Spotify drowns in AI slop, Bandcamp said "humans only" and we love to see it. (source)

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🎓 Indian Startup Raises $30M to Train Humans for Jobs AI Can't Steal

• Emversity doubled its valuation training nurses and hospitality workers - aka jobs that require actual human touch.

• While everyone panics about AI taking jobs, smart money is betting on training humans for the unfakeable roles. Turns out empathy isn't downloadable (yet). (source)

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