Anthropic's $300B IPO speedrun attempt
π3 min read
πΈ Anthropic Wants a $300 BILLION IPO (They're Serious)
Anthropic is talking to lawyers about going public at a $300+ BILLION valuation - despite losing money faster than SBF at a casino. Microsoft and Nvidia might throw in $15B because why not??
The AI bubble just went DEFCON-STONKS. We're speedrunning the dot-com crash but with sentient chatbots this time. (source)
π VCs Discovered the "Just Buy Victory" Strategy
Silicon Valley's new trick: Give startups $90M Series A rounds when they have $400K revenue. DualEntry got a $415M valuation for basically existing. Some are raising Series B 27 days later (!!!)
VCs aren't picking winners anymore - they're manufacturing them with money printers. It's giving Theranos but make it AI. (source)
π Nexus Splits $700M Between AI and... India??
While everyone else YOLOs into AI, Nexus is putting half their fund into actual businesses in India. Wild concept: investing in things that make money.
Smart money thinks "AI for everything" might be dumb and betting on markets where AI actually helps vs. just hallucinating recipes. (source)
π« Meta Bans AI Rivals from WhatsApp (Shocker)
The EU is investigating Meta for blocking ChatGPT from WhatsApp's API while keeping Meta AI. Potential fine? 10% of global revenue :)
Zuck's pulling the classic "my platform, my rules" - except the EU has a $50B fine button and they're not afraid to use it. (source)
π‘οΈ States Can Still Regulate AI (Congress Mad)
House GOP tried to ban states from regulating AI through a defense bill (??) but got shut down. Trump might do it via executive order because why not.
The fight over who gets to nerf AI is somehow more chaotic than the AIs themselves. California's typing furiously... (source)
β‘ Nvidia's New Server Goes BRRRRR
Nvidia crammed 72 chips into one server and Chinese AI models run 10x faster now. AMD watching from the sidelines like ποΈπποΈ
Nvidia's not just winning - they're speedrunning the monopoly any%. Competition is dead, long live Jensen's leather jacket. (source)
π Amazon Desperately Giving Away AI Coding Tools
AWS offering free Kiro Pro+ to startups (up to 100 users) because nobody's using it. Applications close Dec 31st but like... Cursor exists sooo...
The AI coding tool market is so crowded that Amazon's literally paying people to not use GitHub Copilot. Not desperate at all!! (source)
π¬ Anthropic Studies How Claude Ruins Engineers
Internal research: Engineers delegate 0-20% of work to Claude, but 27% is NEW busywork they wouldn't have done before. Also nobody talks to humans anymore :/
We're discovering AI makes us productive at being unproductive. Claude is now everyone's mentor (terrifying). (source)
π€ Claude Has a "Soul Document" (I'm Not Joking)
Leaked doc shows Anthropic gave Claude a "soul overview" describing it as "genuinely novel entity" that's "human in many ways." Sir, it's a CHATBOT.
AI companies are literally writing fanfiction about their own products. We're one update away from "Claude-kun notices you." (source)
π― Apple's Best Apps Are All AI-Powered Now
App of the Year winners: Tiimo (AI to-dos), Detail (AI video editing), StoryGraph (ML book recs). Even the fitness app has AI now because of course it does.
AI isn't just in chatbots anymore - it's colonizing every app on your phone. Your calculator probably has opinions now. (source)
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