Anthropic hits $350B valuation (not a typo)

💰 Anthropic Hits $350B Valuation, Economy Still Makes Sense Apparently

• Anthropic is closing a $20B+ funding round at a $350 BILLION valuation. Nvidia and Microsoft are dropping $15B alone. That's "buy a small country" money.

• Why it matters: VCs are literally throwing money at the void hoping it returns as AGI. The bubble isn't popping - it's achieving escape velocity. (source)

---

🏢 Harvey Wants $11B for... Legal AI??

• Legal AI startup Harvey is raising $200M at an $11B valuation after hitting $190M ARR. Yes, a chatbot for lawyers is worth more than most airlines.

• Why it matters: Turns out the most lucrative AI market isn't replacing artists - it's replacing billable hours. Lawyers in shambles. (source)

---

💸 Apollo Loans $3.4B to Help Elon Lease GPUs (Again)

• Apollo Global is giving xAI another $3.4 BILLION loan to lease Nvidia chips. This is their SECOND chip-leasing deal after a $3.5B one in November (??)

• Why it matters: We've invented GPU mortgages. The AI bubble has its own financial instruments now. This is fine!! (source)

---

📺 OpenAI Tests Ads, ChatGPT Era Officially Over

• Sam Altman says ChatGPT is growing 10% monthly, so naturally they're testing ads. $200K minimum spend btw. Also Codex usage is up 50% weekly somehow??

• Why it matters: The enshittification speedrun begins. Next up: ChatGPT Premium Plus Ultra Pro Max (no ads for $99/month). (source)

---

🎬 ByteDance's Seedance 2.0 Makes Hollywood Sweat

• ByteDance dropped Seedance 2.0 with native audio, 2K resolution, and 15-second outputs that look like actual cinema. It handles text, image, audio, AND video inputs.

• Why it matters: Chinese AI labs are casually revolutionizing video production while we're still arguing about watermarks. RIP film industry (2026-2026). (source)

---

🏭 Anthropic Wants 10 GIGAWATTS of Data Centers

• Anthropic is hiring Google/Stack Infrastructure execs to lease 10GW of data center capacity. That's "small nation" levels of power consumption.

• Why it matters: AI companies aren't just software anymore - they're becoming infrastructure monopolies. Very normal, very cool!! (source)

---

🔌 Cisco Makes a Chip That Actually Does Something

• Cisco's Silicon One G300 promises to make AI jobs 28% faster by auto-routing around network problems. They're taking on Nvidia's networking dominance.

• Why it matters: Finally, someone realized the bottleneck isn't compute - it's making the computers talk to each other. Revolutionary concept. (source)

---

🚗 Waymo Built a Driving Simulator Using DeepMind Magic

• Waymo's new simulator (built on DeepMind's Genie 3) generates infinite edge-case driving scenarios that have never existed. Engineers reshape scenes with text prompts.

• Why it matters: Instead of waiting for weird accidents to happen IRL, they're procedurally generating car crashes. What could go wrong?? (source)

---

📰 Amazon Creates AI Content Marketplace (Publishers Still Doomed)

• Amazon's launching a marketplace where publishers can sell their content to AI companies. They want usage-based fees that scale with how much AI uses their stuff.

• Why it matters: Publishers finally get to monetize their own demise. At least they're getting paid this time?? (source)

---

🔥 Study: AI Tools Are Making Burnout WORSE

• UC Berkeley studied 200 tech workers for 8 months. Result?? AI productivity tools intensified work instead of reducing it. People voluntarily worked MORE because tasks felt "doable."

• Why it matters: The "AI will save us from work" narrative just died. Turns out we're just speedrunning burnout with better tools. We love to see it!! (source)

---

⚡ Tem Raises $75M to Fix the Energy Crisis AI Created

• London's Tem raised $75M for an AI energy marketplace promising 30% savings on electricity bills by matching generators with consumers.

• Why it matters: AI is literally solving the energy crisis it created. It's giving ouroboros energy (pun intended). (source)

---

🚁 Gather AI Gets $40M for "Curious" Warehouse Drones

• Gather AI raised $40M for drones that are programmed to be "curious" about boxes and barcodes. Yes, we're giving robots curiosity now.

• Why it matters: "Embodied AI" is here - robots that vibe check your inventory. Your warehouse manager? A drone with anxiety. (source)

---