🧠 China's brain chips are winning

💰 DBS Bank Drops $110M on "The Next Big AI Thing"

• Singapore's DBS Bank just launched a $110 MILLION AI-focused IPO fund with Granite Asia, exclusively for their wealth clients. Three-year partnership includes M&A advisory and IPO prep.

• Why it matters: Traditional banks are now FOMO-ing into AI venture capital. When your boring bank starts acting like a16z, the bubble's getting spicy. (source)

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🔒 Anthropic's New Tool Finds Bugs Like a Paranoid Developer

• Claude Code Security just dropped - it reasons about code vulnerabilities instead of just pattern-matching. Already found 500+ bugs in open-source projects.

• Why it matters: We're entering the era of AI vs AI cyber warfare. Your code's bugs are about to get roasted by a robot before hackers find them. (source)

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🧠 Startup Trains AI on 2 Million Hours of Brain Waves

• Zyphra's ZUNA model can clean up and predict missing EEG signals. It's trained on more brain data than a neuroscience PhD program.

• Why it matters: We're thisss close to thought-to-text without drilling holes in your skull. The future is typing with your mind (but probably still making typos). (source)

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💧 Sam Altman: "Water Usage Concerns Are Totally Fake"

• OpenAI's CEO called AI water consumption worries "totally fake" and suggested training AI might be more efficient than... checks notes... raising human children??

• Why it matters: Nothing says "we're the good guys" like comparing your data centers to the entire human reproductive cycle. Sir, this is a Wendy's. (source)

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🎙️ Android Finally Gets Good Voice Dictation (Only Took Forever)

• Wispr Flow launched on Android with 30% faster dictation, 100+ languages, and a floating bubble that follows you around like Clippy's revenge.

• Why it matters: Android users can finally dictate texts without sounding like they're having a stroke. Revolutionary!! (source)

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🏠 OpenAI's Building a $300 Speaker That Watches You

• Jony Ive and OpenAI are making a smart speaker with facial recognition for purchases. Ships 2027. AI glasses coming 2028. 200+ people working on it.

• Why it matters: OpenAI went from "we're just a research lab" to "we're competing with Apple on hardware" real quick. The speaker will probably hallucinate your grocery list. (source)

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🌍 UK Joins the "AI Images Are Scary" Bandwagon

• Britain's Information Commissioner and dozens of international authorities warned about AI-generated images without consent, especially of children.

• Why it matters: Regulators finally realized deepfakes exist. Only took them... checks calendar... way too long. (source)

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💱 Trump's Tariff Chaos Continues, Markets Go 🎢

• Supreme Court struck down emergency tariffs, Trump announces 15% rate instead. Hong Kong stocks up 2.5%. Dollar confused.

• Why it matters: Trade policy is now a random number generator, and AI chip supply chains are sweating bullets. (source)

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🤝 South Korea and Brazil Sign 10 MOUs Nobody Will Remember

• The presidents signed deals on AI, digital economy, and critical minerals. Brazil's like "we have rare earths!" Korea's like "we have technology!"

• Why it matters: The global scramble for AI hardware materials is getting Game of Thrones level political. (source)

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🚀 Bill Gurley: "Playing It Safe = Career Suicide"

• Legendary VC says following your passion is now mandatory for survival. Starting a foundation giving 100 people $5k/year to quit their jobs.

• Why it matters: When billionaire VCs start funding people to YOLO their careers, you know AI disruption is about to go BRRRR. (source)

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🛍️ EU's Alternative App Stores Are Actually Happening

• Epic Games Store and AltStore PAL now live on iOS in Europe. Japan's joining the party with new regulations.

• Why it matters: Apple's walled garden is getting bulldozed by bureaucrats. Tim Cook in shambles. (source)

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💸 Quantum Computing Gets €220M Despite Being "Dead"

• Quantonation Ventures raised DOUBLE their first fund for quantum startups. Already invested in 12 companies that definitely understand quantum physics.

• Why it matters: Either quantum's about to pop off, or VCs found a way to lose money even faster than Web3. (source)

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🧬 China's Pricing Brain Implants for Insurance (!!!)

• Chinese provinces setting medical pricing for BCIs. 50+ flexible brain implant trials completed. $165M government fund announced.

• Why it matters: While we're debating ethics, China's already at the "how much does insurance cover for telepathy" stage. Not terrifying at all!! (source)

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🤖 Pika Labs Made Digital Clones That Tweet For You

• "AI Selves" can post on social, send messages, and adapt their personality over time. It's like having an intern that never sleeps and is literally you.

• Why it matters: We've reached peak laziness - outsourcing our own existence to AI. Your clone's probably more interesting anyway. (source)

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🔥 OpenAI Codex Head Teasing "Something Big"

• Cryptic post says current coding agents will look "so primitive it will be funny" in a few weeks. Claims to be "beyond excited."

• Why it matters: When OpenAI execs start subtweeting their own products, GPT-5 announcement incoming. Or they're just high on their own supply. (source)

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